Corporate Death Spiral

A few weeks ago, I received an interesting email from a former colleague at my former former workplace. He came across a news story about the possible sale of our former former workplace.

Though from a reputable media outlet, the article was based on “anonymous sources close to the situation.” In other words, this is mere speculation at this point. Who are these sources? What do they have to gain by leaking this information? Who knows if and when the sale will ever take place? I’m not saying the story is untrue. But like alien sightings and George Clooney marriage rumors, I’ll believe it when it actually happens or when I see it for myself.

Nevertheless, this rather flimsy article reminded me of a phenomenon you see quite often in the business world, and one that I have witnessed firsthand. I call it the corporate death spiral.

It goes something like this: A company encounters revenue shortfalls; maybe it even files for bankruptcy protection (as my former company did). They cut staff and product lines. When that fails to boost profits, the CEO is fired. Of course, oftentimes the company never says he or she was fired; just that he or she left to “pursue other interests.” Pursue other interests?! HA! The company fired your sorry butt, now get the heck outta here.

Then, a new CEO is brought in to basically clean up the mess. Think of a mop-up relief pitcher brought in during a blowout loss in the middle innings. He’s not there to win the game that day. His only job is to minimize the damage so the team can fight another day. (Insert NY Mets bullpen joke here.)

That’s not to say the new CEO isn’t an intelligent, experienced executive. No doubt he or she comes in enthused and with great ideas to somehow elevate revenues. Only…sometimes those grand schemes don’t work out and the company is still bleeding cash.

So the new CEO resorts to the familiar tactic of slashing staff and products in a desperate doggy-paddle to save the company, himself and his cronies. When that fails to move the needle, the CEO throws up his arms in disgust and says, “Uncle! Let’s sell the damn thing!”

Remember, about six months before the article about the possible sale of my former former workplace was published, the company cut over 30 employees. At my former workplace, the CEO sent around a cryptic note alluding to rumors about a possible sale of the company. (I didn’t see anything in the press about it.) Soon after, four others and myself were shown the door.

So you see a pattern here. A company in fiscal straits cuts staff/products, brings in a new CEO, cuts more staff and then puts itself up for sale.

It’s similar to when a homeowner decides to sell their house. They paint and spruce up the bathrooms to make it more attractive to potential buyers. In the corporate world, companies slash a third of their workforce. Gah!

All I can do is shake my head in bitter resignation. For all the hyped-up plans that went bust, for all the people they put out of work, for all the lives destroyed, all those companies did was buy a bit of time and temporarily stave off the inevitable, which is the ruination of a once thriving company. What a sad waste of money and talent. Instead of creating a credible blueprint for success, these companies are barely treading water. They might as well have flushed all that money down the drain, along with a lot of good people who may never see a steady paycheck again.

Another example is the retail stalwart JCPenney. About two years ago, it tried a new pricing method to bring in shoppers. When that failed, it brought in a new CEO, who restored its previous sales pricing system. It also announced a slew of store closures. Recent reports have the chain holding its own. But how long will it survive?

Likewise, how long will my two previous workplaces survive? Will a new buyer snatch them up at bargain prices? Will that new owner embark on a program of staff reduction (as they did at my former former workplace)?

What if no buyer is found? Will both companies be shut down, thereby completing the inevitable corporate death spiral?

Stay tuned.

The Stockholm Syndrome of American Workers

In this blog, I try not to divulge too much about individual companies I have interviewed with. I don’t want to get into trouble with any potential employer, so no names will ever be mentioned. It’s only fair.

However, two recent job interviews that I went on recently crystalized two trends I see in today’s workplace: corporate penny-pinching at its most cheesy and transparent as well as the utter contempt upper management displays toward its employees.

The first job was one near my home with a Major Media Company. I mean, a really, really big media company. Again, no name, but if you own a TV or a computer with an Internet connection, you know this company.

Not to go into too much detail, but it was a job I have extensive experience in and could do very well. Yet since it was a “contract” position, I would be paid only an hourly rate but be afforded no benefits like health care or a 401(k).

That’s not the part that upset me. Companies routinely advertise for contract workers. It saves them money in subsidized benefits. And as I’ve been told on several occasions, if a contract worker doesn’t “work out” the company can easily can them.

Now, as someone who has been laid off two times in the past four years, I think I know the system pretty well. How difficult is it to lay off workers? Does it entail extra paperwork? Maybe, but isn’t that what HR people do? Paperwork? We even clean out our own desks.

And as someone who has been given the “we can no longer support your position so pack up and desk and leave” speech twice, I can assure you no HR person broke out in a sweat, nor was any member of upper management harmed in the process. It’s not that hard to do…for the person doing the lay off, that is. For the person being laid off, it’s sucks pretty bad.

In theory, I have no objection to contract work. With Obamacare, I could probably find some affordable health plan in November. Retirement? Well, that’s another story.

But what truly galled me about this job wasn’t the no-benefits aspect. It was the fact that the interviewers informed me that I would routinely be verbally abused by co-workers (and I use that term loosely, we would work in the same office, that’s about it) who apparently make a sport out of demeaning lowly paid contract workers who are merely doing their job.

I’m no stranger to being reamed out by bosses. I’ve worked with bipolar sufferers and raging alcoholics who brought me to tears at times. We all have. No, I don’t like being screamed at, especially if it's for something that is not of my doing. If I've made a mistake, I'll take the consequences. But if I'm doing my job and doing it professionally, I fail to see why I have to endure bad treatment.

I also have a problem with confrontations; I don’t handle them well. I believe that if I act professionally then the people around me should do the same. Am I in the minority?

Again, what I object to most in this particular case is that I would have to endure these regular beat downs for no health insurance!

Seriously, this company has enough revenues to support benefits for all its employees. It’s also a media outlet that has written and posted many articles on how companies are reducing benefits for workers. What hypocrites! Instead of habitually humiliating underlings, perhaps these puffed-up hotshots should take a look into their own house and how well their own company treats all its workers.

I didn’t get the job. I took a test, but I don’t think even if I did well on the test I would have been hired. The minute I stumbled over the question about how I would handle these egotistical buffoons I was toast. (BTW…if part of the job is to be routinely verbally accosted, why not list that in the requirements, rather than blindsiding applicants with a rather appalling scenario? Seriously, if that is part of the job, let applicants know.)

At least the interviewers were polite to me, even after it was apparent they considered me a weak-kneed bubblehead. I can only wish whomever they hired good luck and skin as thick as an elephant’s. They’ll need it, that and a reasonably priced self-funded health plan.

Just today, I had a similar experience. Again, I’ll overlook the fact that the head of the company didn’t seem to have a specific job description for what he wanted other than “to make my life easier.” (Don’t we all want that? Does he want a worker or a wife?)

I’ll even give him a pass on his obvious lack of understanding about how the industry works. Or the fact that he used swear words during the job interview. 

And since it’s a nice spring day I’ll forgive him for the insulting way he told me “at your age, it would be difficult to get a job.” Way to boost my confidence! Like I didn’t know that already?

No, what really upset me and set off screeching red flags in my mind were his references to his volatile temper. (Another man in the office mentioned his bad temper as well.) Great, another workplace bully.

When he did get into specifics about what the duties of this vaguely defined job would be, he rattled off an absurdly extensive list that would kill a hamster on speed. Having worked in the industry for many years, I know no one could do what he wanted at a high enough level to please him or without getting burnt out in six months to a year. All for a salary that is barely a livable wage in this area of the country.

I could take the low wages, but what I cannot take, nor do I think I should have to take, is workplace bullying for that measly salary.

And was his comment about my age and dim job prospects a threat? “No one else will hire you so you have no choice but to take my mistreatment and like it. Got it?”

Is this what the employment landscape has become in this country? A place where harassment by management, low wages and no benefits are the norm? A place where we can be terminated at any time, for any reason?

Are companies taking advantage of workers and job seekers, especially those out of work through no fault of their own? Are they manipulating our desperation to find and keep a job to pay us low wages, slash benefits and treat us badly?

This depressing situation sadly supports the perception that wealthy and famous people in this country believe they have the right to mistreat anyone they see as beneath them. Shameful. But they obviously don't think they are doing anything wrong.

 Am I the fool for believing I’ll ever work again? Do I accept any job, just for the paycheck, even it it means regular degradation?

Just how much abuse in the workplace are we to tolerate before we rebel and take back our voice? Have workers in this country become Stockholm Syndrome victims?

Living Joblessly

What’s it like to live joblessly? To one day be gainfully employed, and the next day not? To be unconsciously (or unconscionably) uncoupled from your job with no warning?

To lose your job through no fault of your own (or so you’ve been told), yet still be demeaned as a lazy bum by some politicians and society at large?

Since this is my second go-around as a laid-off worker, I have some observations and feelings about what it’s like to be in the perpetual Lent that is long-term unemployment.

Living joblessly means…

Going into stores and seeing beautiful clothes and housewares and delicious food, but knowing you can’t buy. Hard to live in a consumerist society when you can’t be a consumer.

Living with near daily rejection…for jobs you know you can do.

Putting on a happy face with friends and family…but inside you’re dreadfully unhappy.

Feeling like you are suddenly incompetent…even though you’ve built a career for over 20 years. Has my whole life been wasted?

Putting your life on hold. New apartment? No way. Fiat 500? Arrivederci.

Having to job search all day and then watch the New York Mets bullpen blow lead after lead. Had to inject a bit of humor.

Wondering endlessly if there were anything you could have done to save your job. And were you bad at your job? Is that why you were laid off?

Constantly worrying over your rapidly dwindling finances. Will I ever get a job again? Will I end up homeless?

Feeling shame over you jobless state. You’d rather stay inside than have to tell people you’ve been laid off.

You're never quite sure what day it is. Is it Monday? Thursday? Saturday? What's a weekend?

You sometimes think the only thing worse than not getting a job is getting a job. Think on that a bit.

Stressing over how you will pay for health insurance if you don’t get a job, your COBRA runs out and you missed the Obamacare deadline.

Only buying $5 bottles of wine. Just when you need it most...

You become pathologically obsessed with people more successful than you. Anybody with a job is more successful than you.

Realizing how little help there is for the long-term unemployed and how stigmatized you are. You are the 21th Century equivalent of lepers.

Never, ever talking to people about how bad you feel about losing your job. Yet having to spend hours listening to their miniscule problems.

Never, ever having hope. Hope can be crushed so easily.

Joblessness is loneliness.

Those are some of my perceptions of what it’s like to be long-term unemployed. Do you have any others? I’d love to hear them.

How to Find a Job (and Possibly Avoid a Scam)

Many, many moons ago, during one of my previous epic job searches, I went to employment agencies in hopes of finding work. To say I found the experience degrading would be an understatement. It was horrible.

Each time I went, armed with my woefully scant résumé and eager-beaver attitude, I slammed head first into a downright nasty agent who told me every reason he could think of as to why I was not qualified for this or any job. Or he looked past me with a bored expression as I talked. Or he sat stone-faced as his colleagues took frequent cocaine breaks. (This was the ‘80s, after all.) One time, the agent told me he hated New Jersey…as if that were apropos to the job or anything at all.

After about three demeaning tries, I vowed never to go to an employment agency again. Since these agencies make their money when one of their prospects gets hired, I can understand why they would only want to present the most pristine of candidates. But that is no excuse for offensive behavior. Who were they anyway? They worked for an employment agency, the ‘80s equivalent of a call center operator. I left those meetings feeling humiliated and insulted.

So imagine my surprise during my most recent job search that I’ve come across a few employment agencies. Oh, but they don’t call themselves employment agencies anymore. They are recruitment firms now.

Further imagine my surprise when I was actually treated with respect, even when I was not a good fit for the particular job. In one case, the recruiter told me the hiring manager is “very interested” in my background and is trying to set up a time for an interview.

I’m not sure what’s happened in the interim. Did the Better Business Bureau or some government agency crack down on employment agencies after many complaints of their foul treatment of would-be job seekers? Have these employment agencies gone out and hired actual HR professionals, not just anyone off the street? I don’t know, and I’m not sure if it’s the same old scam with a new name. We’ll have to see if I get the actual interview with the company the recruiter has put me up for. When dealing with an employment…ur, recruitment…agency, I remain a bit skeptical.

There are, of course, headhunting firms. However, those are reserved for executives making well into the six or seven figures, not mere peons like the rest of us.

And just a brief update on my search: I’ve been on about 10 interviews since late January but no job offer as of yet. I’m trying to stay positive in the face of mounting rejection and financial pressures. If I think too much about how I’m apparently unqualified to do any job anymore my soul would be crushed. I think my biggest problem may be coming off badly in the interviews.

All this got me thinking about what is the best way to hunt for a job. Do you go through a recruiter? Go to job fairs and networking events? Send out scores of résumés and hope some computerized HR system doesn’t swallow them up?

Does the job searching method depend on the industry? For engineers, perhaps job fairs are the best avenues. For publishing, sending out résumés seems to be the preferred mode and the one I pursue most vigorously. (Yes, I’m résumé spammer. I figure it’s revenge for being laid off twice in four years.)

Or do you try every technique available to find a job? I hate when I read these so-called job coaches say that there is only one way to find a job and it’s usually networking. But what is networking? It’s a rather nebulous term. Does it mean contacting everyone you’ve ever worked with or are connected with on LinkedIn? (I found my former job through a former former colleague.) Going to job fairs and industry events?

I guess what I’m trying to say is that there is no one right way to find a job. Use one or all if you’d like. It also depends on your industry and the method you feel most comfortable with. My only two recommendations would be to get a professionally done résumé (of reasonable cost) and never, ever pay to get on an Internet job board. There are two many free job boards for you to do that.

But what do you find the most advantageous method for finding a job? Tell me, and happy hunting!